“Every night I lie in bed and wonder, I try to take in the scope of the universe. But somehow, I always fail. The size, the complexity of it all overwhelms me. I am a billion atoms. No more, no less. We all are. We’re pieces of dust, waiting for the day that the sun finally sets on each of us. Through all it’s pretentiousness, through all the cliche metaphors and dull poetry, it’s true.” -My diary, aged 13 and 2/12. Clinically depressed and stuck in a pattern of prolific self harm.
Now 16, I like to think I’ve changed a great deal since then. I still suffer with my inner demons and mental health-but as time has changed, I like to think my outlook on life has become more balanced and level-headed. Although far from perfect, I have healthier coping strategies and have learnt to seek help.
I suppose that this is somewhat of a recovery blog-which is a frightening word and even more frightening prospect: but I’d like to be able to reach out to anyone else who’s also struggling with the problems that life brings! I’m very non-judgemental, and whilst I may not be able to “solve” everything, I’ll certainly try to be comforting and understanding.
P.S I did leave a comment on one of your posts, but my phone is playing up a bit so it may not have got through š
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I don’t think I got it! That’s a shame, tell me what it was in the email š
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Hello, I really like your articles and Iād love to know more about your story and thoughts on some of the things you write about. Could I please have an email address to contact you through? š
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Hello! Of course, my email is childofcynicism1@yahoo.com . The feeling is mutual, I’ve been reading a lot of your stuff and am fascinated by it. It would be great to talk to you some more š x
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Ah thanks so much š I’ll be in touch soon x
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Hey again! I’m happy to talk if you want to get in touch, I’ve finally got Wi-Fi after a few days without š x
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I just read this Kate! Awesome, I’m so glad we (cyber!)met! I was literally just about to log on to tell you that my email keeps freezing. I’m not sure if you’ve replied since, but I’ve not been able to reply. So please don’t assume I’m ignoring you! I hope to sort it soon x
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Thanks Kate! š I’ll go have a look š x
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Hi, I just wanted to let you know that you are an amazing and inspiring human being. Your words have moved my heart as I’m sure it has others’. I look forward to more of your awesome thoughts and ideas and just–thank you. Thank you for existing and creating this blog.
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Bless your heart! This is such a lovely note to end my day on š I really never thought that anyone would end up reading (let alone liking!) my blog, so thank you so much! I read your comment on my other post as well, and it’s nice to know that other people are also along the same lines! So thank you for existing š I’ll go check out your blog x
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Well you have to get used to it because you’re awesome and your posts are beyond inspiring š It won’t be long when others will find your blog and be inspired just as I have been and will continue to be š
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Oh, it says you deleted your site?x
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Oh! I changed my blog’s address. I guess I’ll have to fix that. It’s allthetrinkets.wordpress.com š
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Thank you for your blog full of wisdom and humour! It really does make a difference. I wish you all the best
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Thank you so much! That’s so kind of you to say. I wish you all the best too! š x
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Hey, sorry, you still there?xx
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Yes I am xx
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Yay! I’m guessing your email is still not working?xxx
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No, I’ve no idea what’s wrong with it! I’m completely locked out š I’m trying to think of another way to communicate xxx
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Normally, id give you my number, but my mum tends to take my phone without my knowledge…xxx
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Oh wow, that’s kind of bad š Do you not lock it so she can’t read stuff? I don’t know, what else can we do?xx
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Yeah I do, but when I changed the passcode she got annoyed because I must be hiding something….17 years old mum, let it go! Ummmmm…..I can only think of snap chat or email….why is there not a chat feature in here. Im actually going to put that in my feedback to WordPress!
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Same…I don’t know what to do!xxx
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If I put my number in my ‘about’ them as soon as you’ve seen it I’ll take it out?
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Yes okay, ill go there now xx
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Mums got my phone! I’ll text you as soon as I can. Hope you’re ok!xxxx
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Not sure where to say this so I figured I’d say it here….just wanted to say have a good day at school tomorrow, remember only 350 something days left? You can do it š Kai xxxx
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Thanks Kai! Sorry, I haven’t been on for a while š I have replied to you on cl though, did you get it?xxxx
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Don’t know if you’ll see this but CL is being a pain and being special with my log in so if I stop replying that’s why…hope you’re ok?xxxx
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Oh okay š Did you get to the bottom of things with your mum?xxxx
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Haven’t done yet…xxx
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I have replied, but it won’t get posted until tomorrow š Please take care of yourself-my wifi now gets turned off at 11, but I’m here until then.xxx
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Don’t worry, I will. I’m here too. You ok?xxx
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Good, glad to hear it š Meh, okay in a average level not okay kind of way ;). And thank you Kai xxx
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I’m here if you want to talk š¦ you’re welcome š xxxx
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Thank you š I’ve just been thinking about how truly fucking awesome you are actually, so you might as well know š xxx
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Aw bless you š thank you! What made you say that?xxx
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Haha, you’re just such a great person š So kind and caring despite everything you’ve been through, with courage to face each new day in a way that most would not be able to. You have the power to go far-I don’t think you have any limitations whatsoever, actually. Once this shitty period of your life is over, you’re going to shine š xxx
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You actually have no idea what that means to me! I’m sitting here smiling like an idiot now! Thank you! I couldn’t have done it without your support!xxxxx
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Good, hopefully that should overcome your illness! š I reckon you could, because you’re made of some type of titanium, but it’s been a pleasure and I’ve really loved getting to know you š xxxxx
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You’re too sweet š hard as nails, I have to be to change the world;) and meet so many wonderful people like you a long the way. Please stay strong and remember whatever happens I’m here for you!xxxxx
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Indeed! š And I’m sure you will š Aw bless haha, I’m not wonderful, but I do try my best :D. And the same to you too! Whatever happens, you’ll always be able to turn to me for help xxxxx
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If I didn’t believe it was true I wouldn’t have said it;) I know it’s cliche, but if you believe in yourself, anything is possible! This is not the end, just another chapter to our story….I’m going no where by the way and I hope you’ll stay by my side too š xxxxx
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Of course I will! You speak so many wise words š You’ll never get rid of me, I’m afraid. Also, are you able to give a link to the attachment you were sent here, just to see if I could open it?xxxxx
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You’d need my login details š¦ sorry! Thank you though!
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Oh okay š I’m not very clever with computers š xx
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But your amazing with words!xx
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Thank you! As are you š I have replied by the way, but it might not show up tonight xxx
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Okay, I’ll be on here if you need me, although I’m aware that your wifi goes off at 11 xxxxx
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Me again;) you’re going to get sick of seeing my name in your notifications, sorry about that. Just wanted to let you know CL is playing up, it hasn’t posted my reply and will now not let me log on….I’m not ignoring you, promise xxx
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Hey, sorry I missed you message on CL. Are you around?cx
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Hey Kai, I am but my wifi is about to go off
Do you have a phone number? Obviously you can delete the comment as soon as I’ve seen it?xx
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Well my wifi still seems to be on for now, but I’m not sure when that will change xx
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Hello! Great to meet you- “officially”, that is. š
-Amy
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If I like this, you’re not average, so shutup. š š
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Well thank you š
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Hi again! š I’ve set up an email address specifically for this blog, so just to let you know you can contact me through that if you ever need to š
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Is there any way I could send you a message besides your blog?
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Hi š With no disrespect to you at all, I don’t tend to give out my personal details online. Although I’m sure you’re a perfectly good person, I think sharing my contact information online could potentially make me vulnerable. It’s a shame there’s no private chat on here actually, it would be a useful feature x
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Oh no, I get it. I just had an idea of getting people together as a writing group to promote the idea that there are talented teenage writers out there too, and I thought you were a great example of that kind of skill. If you ever change your mind its https://www.facebook.com/pages/Young-Adult-Writers-League/145825195754564
I’m sorry if it sounded weird or creepy but I figured I’d offer.
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Thank you so much, that’s such a nice thing to hear, and also such a great thing for you to be doing. It didn’t sound weird of creepy, but I guess living in the 21st century means that you have to be careful-and not because of you, but because of everyone else who could see it as well. But I definitely will take a look, and it’s also something that I think you should continue with š
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Thanks. And I understand, it’s a good thing you don’t just keep it up for anyone. and thanks for the positivity!
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Hi, I just wanted to let you know I’ve nominated you for the Sunshine Award. Check out my blog for more info š
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Hello! Thank you, I read yours and it was great. My WiFi keeps coming and going, so I will do mine when I’ve got a stronger connection š
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No problem, can’t wait to see it š
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