Hey guys!
It’s four exams down, eighteen to go. In all honesty, I’m exhausted. I hope you are all well, and, as usual, I am here for you all 🙂
————————————————————-‘
Even if you happen not to have been born a millennial, it will come as no great shock for you to hear that young people agonize over, despise (and even face severe mental conditions as a result of) their appearance. Or rather, the obscured image they hold in their mind’s eye.
Percieved as shallow at a superficial analysis, concern and insecurity are often misinterpreted, understandably, but perhaps not justly, as vanity. Labelled as arrogant and vapid, many young adults are trapped in a world of angst, pain, misconception and anguish regarding the reflection that stares back at them each night in the bathroom mirror as they wash their face and brush their teeth.
Teenagers have always faced and endured emotional turbulence, undoubtedly-but since these times, new issues have arisen; namely, the media. And in parallel to these societal adaptation, support and understanding must also increase proportionally. Being sixteen enables me access-and, primarily, a personal insight into the world of the internet, living in a time that can only be considered The Dawn of the Tech-Age.
I imagine, perhaps to some degree naively, the angst that cloaked self identity thirty-or-so years ago to thinly resemble this: fifteen year old girls flicking through magazines, watching their favorite idols on Top of the Pops, wishing to resemble the prettiest of the women; the ones whom everyone either wished to be with, or simply, to be. Adolescence has always been clumsy, awkward and somewhat humiliating for the sufferer; there is no denying that. Nowadays, however, if you make a mistake, it is there for the world to see, forever. The competition, the pressure to look “acceptable” is immense, greatly emphasised and encouraged on Facebook and Instagram.
Having passed through a time of my life where looks were crucial, comparing myself pointlessly and needlessly against the girl sat next to me in maths, I have learnt a life lesson: that looks really are not everything. And young people, particularly women, need to be offered a change in perspective.
Of course, if you’d have informed my slightly younger-incredibly cynical-self of this fact, I would have shrugged it off as utter nonsense; something that sheltered and well- meaning elders preached in an attempt to boost our confidence. Retrospectively, there was more truth in the words that they spoke than I gave credit for. I was wrong, and here is exactly why:
Back in the days of hiding scars, attempting to perfect my hair, my skin, my makeup, I strived to accomplish an delusional look with ever-distancing goal posts. Even at the time, I knew it was a mug’s game; that images and adverts were photoshopped, that personality and kindness were the fundemental aspects of a person. On a conscious level, I knew: but that didn’t change how I felt deep down, beneath all of the intellectual conclusions I’d drawn.
It wasn’t, in fact, until I’d worn a short shirt and been accepted for my external appearance that I realised that I was still pretty, despite having what society (wrongly) deems to be “flaws”. Those who loved and appreciated me couldn’t care less: and those that did care-well, quite frankly, could go and get fucked. What could such narrowminded and dim-witted human beings usefully offer, anyway?
The truth is, when you fall in love with someone’s soul their entire face, the shape of their figure, becomes more attractive. I have been repulsed by the idea of sleeping with someone at first sight, but their seemingly out-of-nowhere clever, witty, humerous remarks and the kindness that spills out of them when they help an old lady up off the floor somehow changes everything. And vice versa, I have adored conventionally beautiful and somewhat stunning people, only to be let down by a dull, bitchy, cruel and uneventful personality. Just like that; the attraction has faded.
I’m not saying that those commonly accepted as attractive don’t have it easier; sometimes, they do. More people may smile at them in the corridors, they may be given unfair leeway regarding deadlines and assignments, their alluring smile may win them the occasional upperhand at a job interview-but often, beauty can be an anticlimax when taking the entire overview of the person into account. Perhaps because they’ve recieved better treatment, been more popular in high school corridors, they lack spark and originality.
And that’s where us “geeks, us “nerds” and us “misfits”, often left on the outskirts of childhood socialising, take over and grab the baton. It is not that such people cannot categorically be good-looking, rather, they are deeper, wiser, more intuitive, than their outer appearance defines them to be.
Models look good in clothes; intellectuals change the future of the world and the lives of those who inhabit it.
Anorexia is the biggest killer of all mental health conditions currently accepted by leading health professionals. Globally, the western world is facing somewhat of an epidemic: among men and women, boys and girls, the old and the young. Although genetic and other psychological issues inevitably contribute, relentless bombarding of images and concepts in the media harms the lives and wellbeing of hundreds of thousands each year.
Let’s make 2017 the year we challenge the media. We are all worth so much more than our outer cases.
Stand to be counted.
Oh God ! Your posts emit so much of positive vibes. Thankyou for these.👌❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment! 🙂 x
LikeLike
I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of saying this: Bea, you never fail to amaze me with your words and the wholesome perspective you share to the world. I don’t need to know what you look like to know that you are a beautiful person, because every post, every word you write in your blog says it all. This is truly an inspiring post 💕
Best of luck with your exams! I’m here cheering on for you 😊 xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Bless you Kate, from your profile picture, I can see that you’re beautiful, but likewise that you have a lovely and deeply caring personality! Thank you so much, they’ve been really occupying my time at the moment 😊 But how are you? Are you well? Any developments?xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Aww gorsh stop Bea, I’ll melt 😳💕 I’m great! Savoring the last couple of weeks before school starts over here. How are you? xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hang on, how come you’re still at school? I swear you were at college/uni? Or did I imagine that? I’m glad to hear you’re doing okay! I’m halfway through exams over here, it’s certainly very stressful 🙂 xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well yeah, school/college/uni. I kinda use them interchangeably whoops 😅 Oh man, exams period is always the stressful part. Hope you’re doing okay and I’m sure you can get through this Bea! 😊💪
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ah, fair enough haha 🙂 Thank you lovely Kate! What’s going on in the Philippines at the moment? We’ve had so much in the UK! Xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ohgorsh PLENTY. For one thing, it’s the start of the rainy season here. And I think two things happened here that became international news. I’m just hoping everyone’s safe and alright. How about you? How are you over there? xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m just not getting notifications for WP anymore, and I don’t know why! Oh really? I mean, there has been a lot going on over here as well. The UK has suffered a lot of heartbreak recently, but i think people are finally pulling together and uniting. I feel really stupid for asking, but remind me, what’s happening in the Philippines?xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, I’m having a problem with WP too lately. I dunno, I hope they’ll fix it in the next update.
Oh yeah, how are you??? UK has been going through a lot of awful recently.
There were some rebel groups attacking in certain places over here, particularly in Mindanao, the southern part of the Philippines. My heart is breaking for the people there, since I’m also from Mindanao. And then there’s politics… sigh. No matter, we’ll get through this 😊 xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
I heard about that! Must be very difficult. I don’t understand all this hate-i mean, obviously intellectually I do, but I find it hard to understand from an emotional point of view: does that make sense? 🙂 Nice to hear from you friend xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, Bea. That makes complete sense because at times when I’m overwhelmed with all these awful news I find it hard to understand too. It’s nice to hear from you too Bea 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Totally agree. How do you have so many exams?! Yuck! Good luck!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know, I have 22 in total,I have been so exhausted recently that I’ve hardly had time to blog! Thank you very much, I hope you are well! X
LikeLiked by 1 person
And this is why I love reading this blog so much! You are so lucky to have grasped this concept at such a young age, because it’s important to realise that imperfection is perfection. I’m very critical of the mass media and the damaging effects it has on fragile developing mentalities, this post is great! Good luck with your exams.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much! I suppose that’s true in a way-although I think I probably did learn the hard way, especially when it comes to things like self harm scars-but having said that, since I made that decision to be out and proud about them, I’ve been so much more confident in life. It’s always good to be critical of the mass media, and a questioning mind is a gift to mankind and all the other species that live alongside us 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I agree with each word you’ve written, even though I’m probably a decade or more older than you. I suppose adolescence is tough and has been tough even historically (look at Scarlett O’Hara form Gone With the Wind). I commend you for having learnt the right lesson so soon in life. I for one, didn’t, even after college. We need more teens like you or else this whole planet will turn into plastic. Good job!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you Pradita, that’s so lovely to hear! I know that I am flawed as a human being, but I do try and live by my word. Indeed, or Holden Colefield from the Catcher in the Rye. It’s not easy, but I do believe with more support teenagers can become happier individuals 🙂 x
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thats right. That and stopping this onslaught on their already frayed nerves about why looks and selfies matter. All the best for the future 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Spot on as always. Couldn’t have said it better myself. Don’t ever stop writing, you can change the world!❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you lovely- the same very much goes for you xxx
LikeLiked by 1 person